Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Lisa

I am linking this to.......  Tuesdays Unwrapped at 

chatting at the sky

Today i am un-wrapping,

Lisa. My firstborn. Today she is 48.
Wow.
That amazes me, that i have a child almost 50 years old.
Wow again.

She was born 35 days before i turned 16.
She was born in St. Catherines Hospital in Grand Junction, Colorado.
We were attended by nuns.
They told me (at that time) i was the youngest to ever deliver in that hospital.

I had always heard nuns were mean, un-happy women, with no patience for mistakes.

Well, i learned that you can't lump everyone with the same title, in the same catagory.

I was babied.
I was lavished with kindness and love.
My feet were rubbed. My hair was combed. My clothes were washed for me,
so that when i went home i would be in clean clothes.

Lisa was held and rocked and passed around from nun to nun.
She was sung to and talked to and snuggled the total 8 days i was in that hospital.

The hospital food 48 years ago was still 'real food' and had flavor.
I was fed very well, and usually it was something i had wanted.

Maybe all that kindness and love that was heaped upon us had something to do with
Lisa turning out to be the loving soul she is.
She has a pure heart.
She is my daughter.
I love her.

Saturday, August 28, 2010

The Decision, part two.

 Jenny Matlock

WEEK 17 ASSIGNMENT

Take any other SC stories (yours or someone elses) and using ANOTHER 100 WORDS...tell us the "rest of the story".

Please copy and paste the first story so we can read both entries easily.

So...

A 100 word story that tells the rest of any previous Saturday Centus! 


I chose 'The Decision'.



The decision was made. No turning back.
AnnieLee, sitting next to me, was rambling on about the past.
"Do you remember the promises's.....?" "Blah blah blah was all i heard. I was thinking, driving six hours is a long time on the road. Six hours spent singing car-aoke and taking in the picturesque scenery, but mostly reminiscing about the good old times.
But those days were long gone and my mind was in a different place now. Or was it? My pulse quickened as i passed the road sign which read "Medford 27 miles". 

After 14 years of hearing the same words, non-stop, i had come to the end of my rope. Just a few more miles and i would be rid of her. Just a bit past Medford and peace will be mine. And her's. 
It is time to set her free, this ghost of love long lost. Time to put her soul to rest.
It is time to let her go. 
                         
                                 
                                                                       PART TWO


Time to let go of this giver of promises that never came to reality.
This betrayer of dreams and hopes. The golden haired liar, trickster, who has run my life for so long.


This has to be 'goodbye', or my life is lost.


I looked over at her. The ghost of myself who would soon be put to rest in the house of he who shaped her.
That AnnieLee who was so tired of the lies and the cover-ups. 


It was time for forgiveness and hope.
Time to live.



Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Green is a Wonder

 This is linking to Jenny Matlock's  Rainbow Summer School....this weeks color is GREEN.

Alphabe-Thursday


Green can sometimes be amazing and wonderous.
Little green frogs hiding in the spring green of a blooming star jasmine.
Green ivy climbing a rock.
This is Brooklyn, our great-granddaughter, watching the wonder of green life.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

A good day.

My last post i was moaning about the heat. It has let up some. Whew. And i thank all you lovely people who left such sweet and loving comments. It amazes me, how people i have never met are so willing to offer support and hope.

Here are some of the things that give me mega joy.
My grand girls having a great day with their papa. 
Seeing their beautiful smiles and the look of wonder that comes over their faces

Last weekend my Old Guy took the grandgirls, Alexis and Ashlyn, to see some cowboys practicing roping, and to visit the mini-horse place. They enjoyed both of course, the roping was exciting and very interesting to them.
Alexis got to see the mini-horses a couple of years ago, Ashlyn was still too young to go off with Papa for such a long time, so this was her first time.

Sadly, the mini-horse place, which used to have 150 or so horses, is now down to just a few. They have decided to retire. But, the few that were there gave much joy to two sweet little girls.
Alexis and Ashlyn, watching the ropers.
Walking through the field to see the horses.
Alexis so wanted to pet the big one, but it kept moving away.  If she would have ignored him,
he would have been more than happy to get up close.
This photo is wonderful. Ashlyn picking grass for the horse.
Her first time being so close to a real horse, no fear, just wondrful joy and trust.
Alexis. Her beautiful smile that turns my heart over every time.
On the way home. She had a very big day.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Whew! this heat!

I used to love the heat. Hot weather made me smile, when it was in the high 90s i was a happy person.
Not any more. Since my lungs have gotten so bad, breathing in the heat takes a lot of energy. Breathing is about all i can do. Moving around, doing anything at all makes it way to hard to get air.
It would help if i could sweat, but because of the meds i take i no longer sweat. Which means my body has no way to cool itself. Who would have thought a person would WISH for sweat?
I have a wet towel around my neck most of the time when it's  hot. It helps.
Our air-conditioner is worthless, blows warm air. We have a fan or two, which keeps the air moving, but, it's still hot air.
Argh.
It doesn't seem nice that after not posting for a week, that when i do it's to moan and groan, and complain.
So.......
here's a nice bit of photos of a snow storm we had back in 04'.
I watched from our back door as this guy was cutting down the tree. I thought it was so beautiful, him up there, like a ghost in the tree, the snow falling on him.
And right now, on this miserably hot day, it looks like a bit of paradise.

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Wham!

Here it is again, Saturday Centus! Fun stories, lots of laughs and maybe a tear or two.
Join us!

 Jenny Matlock
And of course, the prompt is in blue.

Have you ever noticed the little words on the rear-view mirror on your car? The one that says...
'Objects in the rear view mirror are closer than they appear.'?  
Trust me, it's true. Painfully so.

Fun day at the lake.
Brother sitting in the car, listening to music on the radio.
Little sister gonna sneak up and splash water on him.
Creep creep she goes, all hunched over so he won't see her.
Tummy full of tickles and silly butterflies.
There she is, right under his window...
getting all shivery, ready to spring,
and UP she pops!
Face to face with the rear view mirror.
Just before it knocks her out.
Wham!

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

I got lost.

I've been a bit, well, 'lost', the past few days.

I sold my car. My sweet little 2003 PT Cruiser that we bought brand new. My sweet little car that, even though i've had it for 7 years, it had less than 41K miles on it.
We took GOOD care of that car. I loved that car. And, it really hurt to see it go. I didn't want to sell my car, not really, but, there comes a time when you gotta do what you gotta do.
Since i've been on 24/7 oxy, i haven't done much driving. The few times i did, i noticed that my reflexes have slowed down, and my focus isn't as sharp. I asked my doctor about it, he said that because i waited so long to start using the oxygen, especially at night, the lack of oxy to my brain has left a bit of damage.
I'm only 62.  I no longer feel good about driving. What if i caused a crash? Or hit someone crossing the street? I had to ask myself these questions, over and over. What if i forgot to look behind me and ran over a little kid as i was backing up? What if i had one of my granddaughter's in the car with me and crashed? What if..........?
Too many 'what if's' to take the chance. Just the idea of it scares me.

I learned to drive when i was 12 years old. Thats a lot of miles ago. And i love driving. I would get in the car and just drive to be driving. Not going anywhere in particular, just driving. In the years gone by, i've driven across the states a few times, gone here and there and about.  But, in the last year i don't think i've driven 50 miles total. I've driven myself to the doctor a few times, and to Goodwill a time or two, but thats it.  Most of the time the Cruiser sat in the driveway.The Old Guy would wash it for me when it started to get dusty, just in case i decided to go somewhere. One of the girls would borrow it once in a while, or the Old Guy would drive it down for an oil change every 3 months. But, mostly it just sat there.

I really really hated to let it go. It seemed like it was the last bit of 'independence' i have.  You know, having a car so you can go when ever you feel the need or desire. Not having to ask someone else to take you where you have to go.

It's done now. The car is gone. I look out my window and there is an empty driveway until the Old Guy gets home from work and his truck is there.
I hate this feeling. I hate the 'boo-hoo' stuff that comes over me when i think of being stuck here unless i ask for help.

But, life goes on.

And here comes some of it now, skipping down the street, giggling and laughing. A daughter, two granddaughters and the new grandson.

Life. Ya gotta love it.

Monday, August 2, 2010

My Son-in-law

I am linking this to Jenny Matlock's Saturday Centus...
Saturday Centus

I just couldn't help myself.

The prompt is in blue again.

My Son-In-Law

I am thankful for a fine son-in-law. They live just catty-corner across the street. My daughter, her husband, and the 3 sweeties. That means alot to me.
Not only is he a good husband and father, but he is also BIG. And strong. And sweet.
He opens jars for me, and checks in whenever a strange car is in the driveway.
All i have to do is call.
But the opening of the jars, thats a biggy. Cause i get MAD and want to throw them.
That's why it means a lot to me, that they live close. 
He keeps me from breaking things.

The Gift

Come on over to Jenny Matlock's for  Saturday Centus. Amazing people visit there.

 Saturday Centus

I'm not real sure about this, but it's what came out when i put finger to keyboard.
The prompt is in blue.

The Gift


It had cost him so much.
He had given up more than anyone knew.

He gave me the most precious gift, he gave it freely and with love.
But he is gone.

It has kept me warm and eased my sorrows for a long time.
That's why it meant so much to me, and why, even though i miss
him still, it is time to pass it on, to give it away. 


Such a gift must not be hoarded, must not be kept to myself.
There is someone, somewhere in the dark who needs the light of this gift.

Illumination.

The Water Girl

I am linking this to these two fun places, come on over!

Mosaic Monday

Blue Monday 


Alexis is about to turn 9.
For a long time she hated water. No water gun fun, no hose fun, no kiddie pool fun. Just flicking water off of your hand at her would get her upset. We were worried she would never like water.

But then.

In the summer of 07', my Old Guy, her 'papa', went and bought a big 'on top of the ground' pool.

The summers were hot here, day after day of  90-100 degree weather. He yearned for a pool to cool off in after long days of driving rock-truck in the heat and dust.

Alexis stood by and watched the first time everyone got in the pool. We could see that she wanted to try it...she didn't want to be left out, but she just wasn't ready to take that step.

One day, when it was just her and papa, she asked him to get in with her...he took her into the water, held her up and swam her around....she smiled....she giggled..... "i'm swimming nana!"... and she was off. Within a few days she was jumping off of the little board, having fun fights with papa, splashing and laughing. He taught her how to move her arms and legs, how to float, and how to go under.

Now, she is our Water Girl. Whether sprinkler, or pool, she is in it.

These are photos of her first week of pool fun.